'Til Friends Meet Again

Some good things never last. Sadly, beautiful friendships are one of them.

When a friend goes away from your life, let go of that friend. The reason may not be clear. You might be confused what wrong you have done. Sure enough, you are not perfect. You might assume there is something you've done that displeases your friend. You want to ask. You want to communicate. But the reason your friend is going away is because he does not want any communication. He wants space. He wants to solve his own issues. Solving his issues alone might work for him best without your presence. Let your silence allow him to be silent; not as a battle of the will but as a respect for his space.

Just let go and wait. Give him space. Give him respect. Give him understanding. If he comes back be willing to welcome him back. If he does not, he may feel it would be better for the both of you to be apart. He knows much better what works for himself best. 

The letting go might be painful, especially when you know you have done nothing wrong; or if there is, it is your right to know it that you may stand yourself corrected. That you may learn from each other. But the fact that he just slips himself away from your presence means he no longer needs you at the moment. Or, perhaps he has the best of intentions for the both of you. Whichever, just let go.

The one thing that is left in the empty space he left in your heart is the loss of a number one fan, number one friend, number one encourager, number one believer in you. In short--it is hard to believe you lose someone who made you feel good about yourself. You have given that person the power to make you feel good, to make you feel better, to make you believe in yourself, to make you feel a star. Now that he is gone, would you become a nothing? Would you become less whole? On the emotional level it might seem to be; but on a deeper level it is not. You are still whole. You are still capable. You are still you. You do not need anyone to make you whole. You just lose a budding friendship. It hurts. But just feel the hurt and then move on. If he comes back, you are destined by life to be friends. If he does not, just let him go and glorify the experience that once in your life you have meet a friend as precious as he.

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The Greatest Dad

I have the greatest Father I know. He teaches me everything from the day I was born till the day I would breath my last. One of the greatest lessons I learned, and is still learning and would be learning, is the art of walking; for life is a journey, and journey must I. 

At first He holds my hand. When I already know the step He would let me go, though I am still afraid and still not confident of my capacity. At times He just watches me. At times He seems to be out of sight; yet every time I fall He is always there to catch me. Sadly, there are times when He allows me to fall. I will get scars and bruises and all. These are the times I learn to be extra careful the next time and promise myself not to be hurt again. But I am such a weak creature. No matter how much I try, still my steps falter. So many times I cry; so many times my Father kisses my tears goodbye. 

Once I sit planning not to make another step again. My Father nudge me to go on and says, life is not about walking perfectly--it's about taking the small steps to reach the destination. So every time I fall and fail, I keep reminding myself, get up, take another step and reach the destination. And when I falter, I smile to my Loving Father who smiles at me back. I then start to love my journey with wounds, with bruises and all. My soul is ever thankful to have God as my greatest Dad.

Get happy!

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Peak Experiences

Peak experiences are the most valuable deposits in our memory bank. It is described in psychology as transcendent moments of pure joy and elation. In Abraham Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, self-actualization is located at the very top of the pyramid, representing the need to fulfill one’s individual potential. According to Maslow, peak experiences play an important role in self-actualization.

Other experts describe peak experiences as “a heightened sense of wonder, awe, or ecstasy over an experience, or a highly valued experience which is characterized by such intensity of perception, depth of feeling”, or it can be a “sense of profound significance as to cause it to stand out, in the subject’s mind, in more or less permanent contrast to the experiences that surround it in time and space.”

There are many other descriptions of what a peak experience really is. For me, it is a heightened spiritual experience. The best description of it though, would be based on actual experience. I will use the words of Russell E. Dicarlo in describing one. 

“Blanketed by an azure sky, the orange-yellow rays of the setting sun can, at special times, gift us with a moment of such considerable beauty, we find ourselves momentarily stunned, with frozen gaze. The splendor of the moment so dazzles us, our compulsively chattering minds give pause, so as not to mentally whisk us away to a place other than the here-and-now. Bathed in luminescence, a door seems to open to another reality, always present, yet rarely witnessed.” 

Above is a common experience, if one were to witness it during sunrise or sunset with an open heart and mind.

Now let me pull out one of my rarest experiences of it. It happened merely a decade ago. It was just an ordinary sunny Saturday morning inside the campus. No students are present except for those taking the Masteral classes. While waiting for the professor to arrive, we were standing outside of the gymnasium talking leisurely. Fronting the gymnasium was a small yard covered with grasses and of mixed plants and flowers planted along the wall of the fence. There was a tree with birds busy chirping and hopping under it. It was just an ordinary sight of busy birds looking for food and playing. However, suddenly a bird with a straw, around fifteen inches long, hanging down its beak flew swiftly in front of us. In the fleeting moment the most magical thing happened. Five feet above the ground, as the golden rays of the sun hit the bird and the straw floated ever so softly in the air, the bird and the straw turned gold before my eyes as if a golden spotlight from somewhere illumined upon it and made it glow. It glowed so luminously I was stunned. I seemed to be looking at a photograph. The bird froze and the time suspended. Everything was quiet as my eyes grew big in amazement and awe. I felt I was in another place and time away from everything. My spirit was ecstatic I forgot my physical body. Everything stopped. But reality immediately pulled me back as fast as it had let me go. Sensing that I was not alone in my ecstasy, I turned around and saw one of my classmates with a mesmerized expression on her face. Full of awe and in high spirits she asked me, “Have you seen it? Have you seen it?”All I could mutter was, “Yes, yes”. “It was so beautiful!” ”Yes it was.”And we both fell silent still asking ourselves if it was just an illusion while feeling the remaining taste of ecstasy that just entered in our memories. 

Was I lucky? Was I blessed? I do not know. 

They say that self-actualization is considered quite rare, which means that peak experiences can be equally elusive. In one study, researchers found that only about two-percent of individuals surveyed had ever had a peak experience. If this is true, does this mean that God plays favorites? I do not think so. In my experience, I will have one when my soul and spirit are in peace with God; when I commune with God regularly; when my mind is quiet; when I allowed God to take me wholly. And when I allow my mind to live in turmoil and give my full attention to the cares of this material world, these experiences are alien and yes, elusive.

In everything, God is still in command when He would give out or when He would hold back. We just have to do our part. Jesus told us that in order for us to enter the kingdom of heaven we should be like little children. Amazement and awe are inherent characteristics of children. We just have to open our spirit and our soul to every blessing that God is about to shower upon us. Most importantly, we should not put God in a box as if we already know completely who He is. He created the universe and us, and also of wonders, of things that are still undiscovered and unexplained by science. As long as our minds are open, He is willing to bring us to our ultimate peak experience.

A Rose's Life

Beautiful bloom. Fragrant bloom.

Withered. The end.

Does the Rose cry when its petal starts to wilt?

Does the Rose fret when its fragrance fade? 

It does not. The Rose just give what it has to give. It submits to the law of nature. It patiently waits for the passing of the season for it to bloom again its finest. It does not complain. It does not ask why. Somehow deep in its roots it seems to know all is well; bloom and be admired, be picked and be displayed on the table, or be picked and light up a lover's eyes in its finest moment. And when the time comes for the blooms to say goodbye, it humbly lets go of its wilted petals. It does not become sad because it knows it will produce beautiful blooms again. It knows the value of the moment. It knows how it is to give and to let go. It knows how to take the stage. It knows how to just be plain. It knows it just have to live and live fully.

If the Heavenly Father provides the Rose with these qualities, does He too not provide us enough that would ensure us to have a well-lived life?

Get happy!

Photo Credit: 500px

Path To Awareness

Yes, this book is old. It has been with me for twenty-two long years. It was given to me by Sister Elena as a guide on my way to a new path. The words of this book are simple, written by an Indian priest, Father Anthony de Mello. But the message? Oh, so deep until now I am still struggling to apply in my life. I already lost count of the times I read this book. I had read it over and over again. Once I thought I already understood his words and had believed in myself I was that enlightened. But it only took few failures in myself did I realize how ignorant I still was. 

Using the words of Fr. de Mello and borrowing from his experience made me only become self-righteous. One priest said, had he read this book earlier he would have woken up earlier. But me? I was only eighteen when I first got hold of this book; yet I was not any better five or ten years after that. I even came to the point of attempting to burn this book because I thought I did not benefit from it. It only made me feel guilty of not being as enlightened as Father de Mello was. In short,  his words are easy to understand but difficult to apply. Enlightenment or awareness, is honestly like a bubble in the air. You are mesmerized by its beauty when it floats but bursts when it touches your hands; for when you are aware what you learned no longer matters. What matters most is the present moment, the Being that is you.

So then I tossed the book aside and forgot all about it for almost a decade. The other day, I remembered it. I took it from the shelf and started to read again, waiting for any sparks in my spirit. After reading just the first few pages, I finally understood why. Father de Mello became wise because of his learning, of his experiences, of his influences, of everything he had been through. I could only get inspiration from his words and his life. I could only say to myself, 'hey, it is possible to be like him.' But even memorizing all his words could not make me as wise and as enlightened as he had been. I have to follow my own path. I have to learn my own lessons. I have to live my own life. And if all my efforts would pay, I could only say, 'this I have done, this I have become. If you want to be where I am, hear my words but do not follow me. Do your own thing, dance your own dance, paint your own masterpiece, for it is only you who knows deep in your heart what makes you happy and what makes you realize your Being.'

God sent people in our lives that would serve as our guides. But our final destination depends solely on us. This is where our Will play the crucial path. Learning and becoming is not done overnight. It would take a lifetime. And we are so blessed if we would be able to realize this before our candle gives off its light.

On my part, I am so thankful for meeting Fr. de Mello at an earlier age for I already know where my destination is. Getting there is my only struggle. But with God, I know someday I will become the Being I am supposed to be. And I hope you would be too.

Get happy!

Lessons In Heartbreak

I read this story from babble.com. I share it here because I believe it would touch you too the way it touched me.

There is a Jewish Mystic story about and old Rabbi who taught his disciples to memorize the teachings and place the holy words on their hearts.

"Why on our hearts, and not in them?" one student asked.

"We put the words on our hearts, so that someday when our hearts break they will fall in."

True right? We learn the most when our hearts break. Things will become clear when our hearts break. And we become wiser when we pass through a heartbreak. Heartbreaks teach us. Heartbreaks strengthen us. 

Get happy!

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The Process Of Becoming

This is a  re-post from Fr. Ronnie E. Ablong's  facebook account. You may view the original post here: fb/ronnieablong. It is Fr. Ronnie's desire to spread the word of God through media. And it is my pleasure to share his thoughts here. (Posted with permission).

We learn to walk by walking just as we learn to talk by talking. Life is a constant process of becoming and there never seems to be enough for in this world the only permanent is change. And there is no escape except in the tender embrace of God whom Jesus called "Abba" (Father).
We all want comfort; we all long for consolation; we all need acceptance and appreciation. Sometimes it comes, at other times, does not or not at all. It slips through our grip because our hands are greased with hatred and jealousy; our hearts are envious, our thoughts vengeful. In life, we cannot have all that we like and all that we ever wanted so we may see the need of a God who truly provides.
Life's greatest lessons are learned in adversity and not in plenty; its farthest stride are not made at sunrise but at sunset. There's something in moving on than in stepping back. The former is hope; the latter is depression.
Walking. Moving on. Making strides. These are part of the thing called life.

Get happy!